Chapter 43

The bustling city scenery was now flying past Natalia's eyes, and – as with everything else that was happening that afternoon – it was all a blur. Jacques had made the wise decision that someone should drive Natalia's car back to the hotel and she should be escorted safely in the limousine. The former personal assistant thought that he had done what was in everyone's best interest by volunteering to drive the car home, allowing the Rivera siblings some quiet family time together on this sorrowful day. It was a kind – however misguided – gesture and one that Mateo planned to use to his full advantage.

The youngest Rivera knew that it would be far more appropriate to exercise a certain level of tact in this situation. He had a very detached reaction to the death of his father. Antonio Rivera was the man that gave him life; the man took him in when his mother passed away. As a boy, Mateo had been given everything that his elder sibling received and was not treated any differently... by Antonio, that is. Although he was thrust into quite the lavish life of wealth and fame, he had always believed that the material possessions and opportunities offered by a seemingly doting father were merely given up as penance for a guilty conscience. His half-sister's blatant refusal to acknowledge his existence, for the most part, kept him continually aware that he was indeed an outsider; unwanted and - though cared for - seldom loved.

He looked at his clearly distraught sister, knowing he should try to say something comforting. Years of petty resentments were now in the way. It was too much to expect him not to hurt her for all the unkind things she had ever said. It was time for payback. He turned to look out his window and said a quick goodbye to the last remaining shred of decency he had left, and then with cold eyes, he turned back to Natalia.

“So,” Mateo began, trying not to sound as upbeat as he felt. “I guess you can finally sell the franchise.”

It was as if a knife had been shoved further into Natalia’s already wounded, bleeding heart. Amongst the innumerable emotions of this day, anger had been a frontrunner; Anger at Death for taking her father; Anger at herself for purposefully making herself unreachable. Anger at Olivia for stirring up feelings of happiness and contentment within her, while her only loved one lay dying in a hospital bed, without his beloved daughter by his side.

Up until this point, she had done her best to not let her anger control her. However, with those callous and brazenly antagonistic words, she lost the ability to hold back. She stared, just as coldly, back at her brother.

“Are you enjoying yourself, Mateo?”

The man stifled a smile. “What on earth would make you say that?” he asked.

“Why, exactly, should you give a damn about the company? You never have before!”

Mateo played innocent and threw his hands up in surrender. “Hey... just trying to make small talk.” He waited until she had looked away in disgust. “I would think you would be happy to get what you’ve always wanted.” This time, as he looked out his own window, he couldn’t contain a slight, sly grin.

“You’re despicable!” Natalia hissed back, her cheeks beginning to burn with fury. “Our father is dead, and all you can think about is tormenting me?”

“Oh, so now he is my ‘father’?” Mateo gave a sinister chuckle. “What’s wrong, Natalia? Now that you’ve lost the last member of your precious clan, you’re feeling a bit sentimental?”

“Fuck you!”

“No really, it’s endearing” he guffawed. “Our father... that’s a good one!” He shook his head and smiled.

“I don’t know why you are smiling? You know damn well he left the entire control of Empire to me,” she said triumphantly. “Why concern yourself with what I do with the company when you should be looking for a new place to live!”

Mateo rolled his eyes, “Like I said... just making small talk.”

The rest of the ride was spent in silence. Natalia felt tears trying to form in her eyes but would not let them fall in front of her nemesis. She was thankful that someone had thought to call security to have the side entrance sealed off, barring any of the paparazzi from getting too close to the limousine, though she could still hear the sounds of many photos being taken. She escaped from the car quickly and went straight up to the executive suite floor.

The elevator doors opened to the same hallway that she had not too long ago strolled down with an excited, giggling little girl and her mother. She remembered the feeling she’d had then. It was nameless, but it was wonderful.

And now Natalia was numb.

The closer she got to her own suite, she felt as though she were being pulled down to the center of the earth; her body felt like a lead weight. Everything felt different inside the hotel; it even looked different now that her father was gone. It was as though her entire perspective had been changed and it was causing everything around her to feel foreign. But out of the confusing numbness, there was one feeling Natalia couldn’t shake.

As she turned to her door to unlock it with her key-card, she could feel Olivia behind her and almost turned around. Instead, she swiped her key, entered her darkened suite, and shut her door as quietly as possible.

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Olivia rested her forehead on the inside of her own door and sighed. She had watched the limousine pull around to the side of the hotel from her vigil at the window. She had heard the elevator doors open and she knew that Natalia was coming closer to her. Even if she hadn’t heard a thing, she was fairly certain she would have felt the younger woman’s presence. Olivia had moved to the door quickly and had her hand on the handle, but couldn’t turn it. She knew that what the other woman needed right now was time, and if Natalia had wanted to speak to her – or needed her – she would have knocked on her door. Instead, Olivia listened as a Natalia retreated into her room.

A great debate had begun inside Olivia’s head: Should she follow her young daughter’s advice and simplify matters by doing what she wanted to do the most – go to Natalia and do whatever she could to be of some comfort? Or, should she accept the fact that she had no reason to even suspect that Natalia would want to see her right now. She had no title by which to explain the closeness and concern she felt for the grieving hotelier. She was not dating Natalia. She was not a lover, nor even what could be a considered a close friend. Anyone with such a title would be allowed to simply go to Natalia, without question. It would be expected.

No matter what she felt for Natalia -whatever it was that was happening between them- Olivia knew she was a ‘nobody’ in this situation. What right did she have to rush to the younger woman’s aid? How presumptuous that would look?

It’s not as if she’s my girlfriend or anything. Olivia could not believe she was trying to make that statement sound so nonchalant, even within her own head, as her stomach filled with butterflies at just the very idea of it.

She sank down into the couch and mindlessly changed the channel on the television and occasionally glanced back towards her door. Her cell phone rang for the hundredth time in the past hour. Olivia saw the name on the caller ID and moaned in frustration as she tossed the phone back onto a nearby cushion. Greg was making one last attempt at getting a statement from her – some sort of answer he could give that might appease the questioning colleagues and shareholders who needed to know what would now become of the proposed merger.

“Fuck it,” Olivia exclaimed and grabbed her cell phone. “She gave me an orgasm. That means I’m allowed to care.” 

The humor in that logic would normally have made her smirk, but she was too busy planning what she was would say to Natalia. Finding the right number and pausing for a brief moment to repeat the words of advice her daughter had given her earlier... “Make it simple, Spencer,” she said to herself as she typed in a text message.

OSpencer: Can I come over?

That was it. Olivia put down the phone and waited several moments, resuming her mixture of internal debates while staring at the muted television. Her cell phone beeped unexpectedly. She palmed it swiftly and held her breath.

NRivera: Yes

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All of the lights in Natalia’s suite were off, save for a dim light that was coming from the kitchen. The only other luminescence in the room was from the sunset that made it through the small slits of the mostly drawn curtains. Olivia pushed past the entrance and closed the door.

“Natalia?” Olivia called out quietly. Due to the darkness of the room, she couldn’t be sure whether the other woman was near or far.

"You'll have to excuse the mess."

Olivia heard Natalia's voice coming from the kitchen ahead and to the right. She slowly made her way to the island counter top that helped separate the two main rooms where she found the other hotelier standing in front of a wide open fridge and drinking orange juice from a large carton. Olivia surveyed the area around them.

"What mess?” she asked.

The silhouetted figure shifted her position, and in doing so, her heel came down on a chunk of glass from the cup she had dropped earlier in the day, grinding it into the linoleum. Olivia peered around the corner of the island, looked at the sticky mess of spilled juice and broken glass, and then back to Natalia.

"That juice hadn't been lying on the floor all day, had it?" she asked.

Natalia swallowed more of the warm liquid. "Quite possibly," she answered.

Olivia grimaced and then sighed. "Okay..." She pushed herself away from the island and moved around it. After closing the refrigerator door she took the carton gently from Natalia and tossed it into the sink. "Come on, let's go sit down," she motioned to the couch with her head and started heading for the living room.

"I don't want to sit; I want to stand."

"In glass shards?"

Natalia didn't respond.

"Alright," Olivia said slowly. "Can you at least decide to stand somewhere else? We don't need you going over on your heels and breaking an ankle."

The dazed woman hesitated, but eventually moved forward until she was out of the kitchen – glass crunching under her shoes as she walked. She turned sideways so that she wasn't facing Olivia and folded her arms.

Olivia moved beside her and delicately swept the long dark strands of hair away from the grieving woman's face. She wanted to see her – as heartbreakingly pale and frightened as she looked in that moment.

"Natalia..." she said softly, noticing sad eyes flutter, then close. She paused for a moment and then moved in front of the fragile woman. She placed both hands on hunched shoulders. "Natalia... " she said again and waited until Natalia looked up at her with eyes that were now brimming with tears. Concern and empathy washed over Olivia as she reached to cup Natalia's face with her hand, her thumb brushing away a falling tear. "Natalia, I..." She wanted to say something – anything – that would convey her heartfelt sadness for Natalia's loss, but the words wouldn't form. She knew that saying 'I'm sorry' would seem trite, and 'It's going to be okay' would make her want to slap her own self for uttering it. Still she tried once more to find the right words.

"I just..." she began. "I wish..." she stopped. Exasperated, Olivia gave up, sighed, and shook her head.

Natalia closed her eyes and nodded slightly.

The taller woman leaned down and wrapped her arms around the crying hotelier.

Natalia leaned into the embrace, accepting whatever comfort she could take from it. For whatever reason, though, she couldn't will herself to raise her own arms and hug Olivia back. She could feel Olivia's warmth against her and wanted desperately to just get lost in it; to feel enveloped and protected. She wanted to forget about the pain, sorrow, and the emptiness of loss and just remember the happiness she had felt earlier in the day while chatting, laughing, and learning to relax with Olivia and her sweet daughter. In the way of those happy thoughts now stood guilt, anger, and regret. She didn't push away from Olivia, nor did she want to. The walls were starting to go up again, however, and Natalia could feel it happening. She recognized it, and – in her opinion – she needed those walls right now.

"I haven't decided what I'll do about the merger," Natalia said, in as neutral a tone as possible.

Olivia instantly stiffened slightly. She knew she should take the remark for what it was – an ingrained defense mechanism – but it stung. She pulled away from Natalia and calmly took a deep breath.

"That's not why I'm here," she responded, looking directly into the other woman's eyes.

Natalia averted the intense gaze by turning her head to the side.

"You know that's not why I'm here," Olivia reinforced, with a slightly firmer tone. Now wasn't the time to battle for ground in the constant war for Natalia's affections, but Olivia didn't exactly want to lose any ground, either.

Natalia cleared her throat. "Regardless," she said evenly, "meetings will have to be held all over again, and I have no idea when I'm going to be able to find time for them. I have shareholders to meet with. I need to get a hold of our off-shore property records as I wasn't the one handling them. I've got to take care of the press, and everything has to get sorted out from the..." Natalia hesitated, "...from the..."

"Stop it." Olivia softly commanded.

"...from the Will." Natalia's eyes lost their focus and she began to sway. Olivia reached out quickly to steady her.

"Natalia, stop! Take a breath... Don't worry about any of that right now. You have an entire league of people who are taking care of those things for you."

The younger woman was dazed. All she wanted to do was fall into Olivia's arms and feel safe, but there was no use in any of that anymore. She felt heavy – weighed down by the burden of grief and guilt. "I have to say that I doubt very highly that I will be merging with you any time soon," she said.

Olivia couldn't help but smirk at that sentence.

"Our two companies..." Natalia quickly corrected herself. "I doubt I'll be merging this company with yours." She folded her arms once again and stared at a random piece of furniture in the living-room.

Olivia studied her for several moments before sighing. "Fair enough," was her simple reply, which caught Natalia by surprise.

Natalia continued suspiciously. "Which means that there really isn't any reason for you to be here until l can get around to meeting with you and your team... to officially decline your offer."

"At the risk of sounding like a broken record... Stop it!"

"Stop what?"

"Natalia, your father has just passed away."

"I am very much aware of that!"

"So stop!"

Olivia waited to make sure that Natalia was done resisting and then moved passed the stunned woman and into the kitchen. "Go into your bedroom and lie down, I will be there in a minute," she said as she searched for the cupboard that contained Natalia's glassware and ran the water.

"What are you doing?" Natalia asked.

The older woman filled a cup and turned. "Either call security and have me escorted from the building, or placate my overbearing – yet well meant – nurturing concern, and do as I say." She led Natalia by the hand, over to the hallway. "I'm not leaving voluntarily until you are out of those shoes and under the covers, getting some much needed rest. Clothing is optional. " She winked. "Now, where do you keep 'Mama's Little Helpers?"

Natalia stuttered her response. "I-I don't know what you-"

Olivia cocked her head to the side in disbelief and stood there until Natalia relented.

"Top shelf of the medicine cabinet in the bathroom," she sighed, as Olivia handed over the glass of water. "But I don't need any, I'm fine!"

"Of course you are, Natalia." Olivia smiled knowingly as she turned and headed down the hallway. "You are still an unstoppable force, capable of demolishing great nations into piles of rubble – even though you are currently unable to stand."

"You don't have to do this for me," Natalia said quietly.

Olivia stopped at the bathroom door and turned. "I know," she said. "Guess I must reeeaally want that merger, huh?"

With that, the blonde disappeared into the bathroom, leaving the stunned woman out in the hallway, looking at the glass of water, and not knowing whether to laugh or cry.

"Natalia!" Olivia called out. "Bedroom! Now!"